Side Effects May Include The Ability To Get Through One More Mediocre Day.

It's nighttime, and soon I'll swallow the Ambien that will serve as a cut off switch to end this day. Hopefully I won't drink too much and I'll remember to lie down before it sinks into my brain, so I won't do things like have entire Facebook chats I don't remember, so I won't have to piece together what I did this night from clues that are available tomorrow morning. Hopefully, but don't count on it. There are new episodes of Beavis and Butthead on MTV.com, and those little guys remind me of the 90's, which were my decade of hope. I'll probably watch them and not remember.

Soon it will be daytime, and a jolt of Wellbutrin will make it possible for me to get out of bed and face you. I'll open the bedroom curtains and look for something. It's better with the Wellbutrin, honest it is. Before the Wellbutrin I didn't know if it was gonna be you or me, but someone was gonna get hurt. Probably me now that I think about it. I'm a lot easier to hurt. Anyway, we don't have to worry about that these days. The Wellbutrin has lifted some of the fog from my brain and let me be productive again and keep a smile on my face as you ask me about shampoo and demand to know what happened to BC headache powders. The only reason I'm able to type this now is because of the Wellbutrin. Otherwise I'd be outside on the deck staring into the night looking for something.

It's probably making some of you uncomfortable to read this. People don't like to hear about other people who take antidepressants. I'll put you at ease by instead writing about how I burned my hand on the stove tonight. The skin on my fingers is turning white and thick and it hurts like hell. I'll take a couple more pills for that.

I wonder if you know I have to wring every last bit of norepinephrine from my brain the way a man stranded in the desert would desperately squeeze out every last drop of water from a sponge just to be able to get through a workday. My mind probably stopped producing the norepinephrine on its own because it saw what it was getting me. Making me say it three times won't change the fact you should see a doctor for that wart on your genitals. No, there isn't an over the counter cream that will help. Even if you make me say it four times.

The little red light just went off so I ran to the phone. Maybe somebody left me a message on Facebook. The little flickers of light are the only moments of hope left in the day now. Like dying embers in the fire of the 90's. The other day Michael Moore sent me a direct message on Twitter. Seriously.

The giant martini I just poured will help me forget about this. It'll wipe the memory clean and let me jolt myself awake with the Wellbutrin tomorrow with a blank slate and the ability to pretend maybe something will be written on it. Or at least that the little red light will go off and it will be someone I'll want to text back.

There has to be more than this. I know there can be a lot less.
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Side Effects May Include The Ability To Get Through One More Mediocre Day.
Side Effects May Include The Ability To Get Through One More Mediocre Day.
Reviewed by malaria
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Rating : 4.5