My Cat Seeks Medical Attention.

The hairballs had been unbearable, but now her mind was at ease.

The dashingly good looking veterinarian had told her that the malady was easily treated as he handed over the signed slip of paper. "Just take this to your local drugstore and you'll be as good as new by the morning." he said. Spooky had noticed a stunningly beautiful Persian cat in a business suit and a low cut blouse walking out of the vet's office as she made her way to the appointment that morning. Little did she know that was a sign of trouble. Right now though, as she made her way into the pharmacy, she felt reassured. That everything would soon be better and the constant tummy torment would soon end. She assumed the sign above the front door stood for "Cats are Very Special"

The first thing she noticed was a line at least 20 deep waiting to get to the drop off window. It made her want to take a nap. She woke up 2 hours later and the line was now down to 15. Eventually she made her way to the counter and was told it would take at least an hour to fill her prescription. She started to softly purr.....

"Is there any way you could get it done sooner? Look how fluffy and attractive I am. Surely a creature so cute should not be made to wait more than 10 minutes"

She was then told it would be an hour and a half.

She let out a hiss, and was then distracted by an open plastic bag being blown down the antacid aisle. Must chase the bag.

The bag was captured and hidden inside of for a good 10 minutes, which left 80 more to kill. On her way to the other side of the store to shoplift some catnip she stopped twice for emergency grooming.

She talked to no one this whole time. My cat is a total bitch. Once she got high off the catnip she sat on her paws with her back to the rest of the store.

Not that she wasn't pleased. The fact that it was stolen made the catnip high all the better, but eventually her tummy was rumbly again and it was the time the prescription was promised to be ready.

She waited 2 more hours to get to the pickup window. It was then she learned a trick to use when dealing with the Cats are Very Special pharmacy. If you immediately walk over to the pickup line as soon as you are done dropping off your prescription, by the time it is your turn it will be past the time they promised your prescription would be ready.

She wondered how the place treated humans if this is how they dealt with the Creatures they thought were Very Special.

When she got to the counter.....


....she got the bad news. The slutty Persian sales rep had convinced the good veterinarian to start writing prescriptions for a hairball treatment that cost 20 times as much as anything else on the market, but had the clinical advantage of being advertised on TV. It would require a prior authorization from her insurance company. Spooky arched her back and stood her fur on end, but to no avail. She whipped out her cellphone and called the vet. The office was closed. She called the Drugmonkey. He was hung over and asleep. Spooky's tummy hurt. She coughed up a hairball on the counter and went home to mourn the wasted day.

I've decided the key to getting some of my blog groove back is to write more while intoxicated. I'll have to look this over in the morning when I'm of the sober and decide if I was right.

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My Cat Seeks Medical Attention.
My Cat Seeks Medical Attention.
Reviewed by malaria
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Rating : 4.5